Wednesday, September 24, 2008

Video, layout.. and how it was made.... oh my.

A friend and I say that word loosely emailed me THIS video. Yet one more reason I love living in Mobile Alabama. I haven't yet encountered said creature in video but am interested if guido would try to eat it as he does the squirrels in our back yard.


Yes I know it is not St. Patricks day but anytime anything remotely funny goes on and it is in the near vacinity of Alabama I get a flood of emails asking if these are my neighbors and or relatives. I know they are waiting for the day I say yes. It is bound to happen, The news cameras just havn't shown up yet to judge which of my neighbors driveways are the most clean, unleafed shiney white driveways on the planet. They can be seen from the space shuttle and they say "OHHHH look! That is Nancy Jones neighbors, They are out bleaching their driveway." YES people it happens.

When I had this last MS spell, and was in the hospital, after my soon arrival home and the medication that they gave me made my head just pound and eye cringe, that is not even CLOSE to an accurate description. No amount of medication could make it stop.
THIS SO HAPPENED to be the week that every neighbor wanted to try out their leaf blowers. As well as teach their animals to pee on the one tree we have in our yard verses the 769987654 kabillion that are in the rest of our neighborhood and make my
dog absolutly, loose his mind, and freak his crapp out, underneath my window, to be sure I KNEW, some foreign dog, was using MY TREE as its urinal and he was SOOOOOOOOO not in approval. It was a conspiracy with the squirrels to dominate his space and he was not having it for a minute. HE would give this speech in that tone every day underneath my window where I would beg my husband to pull his vocal cords out with a rusty spoon.
are you still with me? Well, My sweet husband, I love so much, risked embarrasment and a nasty note from The homeowners association to talk to our neighbors, and asked them to please not blow off their driveways, because he couldnt deal with my crying that it made Bella cry then Guido howl and he was running out of ibuprofen for his own headache. Our sweet neighbors agreed and I know it was the worst two weeks of their life. I have now gotten better and it doesn't bother me so much as long as it is AFTER 7 am on a Saturday.
IT is part of What we get for living in Mobile ALabama, in a Middle class neighborhood, surrounded by older men who spent time in the service and have flashbacks of kp duty and are now forced to compete for who has the cleanest concrete to drive on.

I secretly want to go out at night and write in side walk chalk HAHA YOU LOOSE MISSED A SPOT, but figure they will know it is me and come blow off my leaf strewn drive
way and totally ruin my fall decorating scheme I have going.

I actually took time off from connecting the dots of my chicken pocked body yesterday to scrap. I used the new URBAN PRAIRIE (ohhh ahhh) by Basic Grey and scrapped this photo of Bella strangling, I mean Hugging Guido in the back yard. I know yall have heard how he thinks she is HIS. We officially have given her to him a few times but she keeps showing up at meal times so we decided to share her.
She has taken over most of the care and love of Guido. She loves that dog. HE loves her. Works out pretty good. I also used some things left over from the kits provided by SCRAPBOOK OBSESSIONS , THEY ROCK by the way, on this page.
I was not in good form yesterday or mood to say the least. I felt like crapp and was enjoying the quiet, all but qvc on low on the television (definitly not Hannah Montana thank you lord) and some mind boggling, never scrapbooked before people, who were trying to convince me to buy 98654 pieces of cardstock for the low price of 19.99 BUT WAIT.... if you act now....

When my daughter whom we will call, Bella, comes bouncing in all boistrous and singing. Do any of you remember having chicken pox? no? prolly cuz you were a normal person and had them ONLY ONE TIME and you WERE A KID when you did and you blocked it out of your head entirely. Ok let me splain this best I can. NOISE.... HURTS. your
entire body. Makes you want to reach out and touch someone and not by phone!
Ok so anyway I finally got her to chill a bit then reminded hubby that consignment drop off was today and we have a crib in the garage, Bella is 5, I have 1 ovary and no uterus. Unless he had plans that I was not yet aware of.. IT NEEDED TO GO. We have so much clutter around this house which is ENTIRELY mostly my fault. I have been sick since February and totally let my ability of keeping house fall upon him and Bella. AND BY THE WAY.....
(WHomever is spamming my email account with information on quick cures off the internet. Please stop, Im not gonna forward it to 20 people for good luck, yes I read about artificial sweetners and I dont drink diet drinks and I understand your cousin Elroy on your ex sister in laws side of the family saw Binny Hin and when he smacked his forehead lightning struck and he was cured but I will take my faith in the lord and carry it with me to the dr. I think the FDA may be onto something here with these new treatments. Thank you for understanding)
so anyway, She is bouncing around my craft room, twirling in my chair, discussing the events of her day when she bumps the table and GLUE goes everywhereeeeeeeee. I ussually count to a thousand sometimes more when things happen cuz well SHE IS FIVE and I was as bad if not worse than her (still am) they dont call me GRACE cause Im graceful. BUt I felt bad and I had worked on this page alll day because I felt bad trying to convince myself I REALLY DIDNT feel bad, so what do I do when the glue goes all over my layout... I CRY.
yup like a baby the tears flew. I sat in the chair in my scrap room and bawled. Now it could be the added hormones from the steroids (ya most likely) the fever (nah) or all said above, (that would be my guess) my sweet daughter looks at me as if to say (oh crapp I finally did it, she lost her mind, her head is going to explode. yall watch this, WHEHEWW) and strokes my hair and says..
"DOes this mean your finished crapbookin today?" for some reason that hit me as HYSTERICAL and I started laughing. She is looking around for, like, where is the tv crew for You've been punked, then she runs off. IM not sure out of fear or If she got bored.
So, I look at this page I had worked on for ohhhh off and on, ALL DAY. And sigh. oh well don't they say mistakes are just places to add more embellishments? well THERE YA GO. That is how most of the objects were put on this page. TO COVER UP all the GLUE she slung all over the page.
SO you may get your embellishing tutorial guide from Bella, starting next spring, on QVC, announced by some salesperson, who knows nothing about scrapbooking, all for the low price......
BUT WAIT!
Hope you have a good day.

15 comments:

DebW said...

Great video! Love the sketch they did!LOL!
Feel better girlie!

Jocelyn said...

Oh no I missed the QVC show! Well I just saved me some money! Love your LO and love the crapbooking. Still on the I CAN mantra and Joe and I got all kinds of things done in this house, but guess what, I was a bad girl and overdid it and the Myasthenia Gravis is kicking my butt today! Love the pic of Bella, you are so lucky and blessed. Please feel better and go get the neigbors with the sidewalk chalk, he he :)! I have a couple that I would like to do more than chalk their driveways!!!! Hope you have a great day!!!

jan williams said...

That was too damn funny!!! LOVE that video, and the sketch of the short man....Bwhahahahahaha and to throw in that picture of Bella wearing her clover shirt, just added to it!!!! LOL But I laughed so hard at the part where yall gave Bella to Guido....OMG you are a nutt woman!!!!!!!!

Little Ol' Liz said...

oh My Gawd! That Bella and her painfully obvious "crapbookin'". I have tears in my eyes from laughing! She is such a wasted talent. You should put her on Leno and let her earn her keep.

Pattern Paper Addict said...

cute LO! I love the color combo you used.

noeliaevangelista said...

That video is funny...is it real? Are people really that clueless? I wish we had QVC here. I keep hearing about it but I don't think it's available in Canada, but I could be wrong.

ToneF said...

Hello :) Just saying hello to you! Thanks for nice comments on my blog!
Cute layout :o)

vtpuggirl said...

LOL, what a funny post! I hope you have a good time decorating your driveway and making your anal neighbors crazy!

Chantele said...

I live in TN not AL but I find it extremely funny that whenever a news crew films anything where they ask the locals they always seem to find those few folks that are totally clueless and make the dumbest statements. I mean, come on..."He got a hold of some bad crack"...WHO FREAKN SAYS THAT and means it? LOL! Too funny. I especially liked the sketch, did Bella draw that for them? LOL!
That video was hilarious and the fact that it was on the local news makes it even funnier. Thanks for the laugh. Life in the fast lane

Leslie Ashe said...

BWAHAHAHAHAH!!!! Is that your tree (in the video) that all the dogs pee on? Maybe Guido's barking because he sees the leprechaun and is trying to tell you to get out there and dig for gold! (and I'm not talkin' boogers, LOL)

Omg - I just made myself LAUGH!

Bella bug is so stinkin' cute!

Rita said...

Love your sense of humor and retelling of events, especially the driveway story and your "fall" decor. That made me lol!

Anabelle said...

Love that layout. The colors are awesome and so is the design! Your pictures of your daughter are so cute.

Audrey Pettit said...

You'll have to let me know when that book comes out...........because at only $19.95, that is going to be a steal for sure! :) But honestly, it really does sound like you are going through a lot right now and are still managing to keep your sense of humor. I hope you feel better soon! Keep up the crapbooking! And thanks for stopping by my blog and leaving me a comment. I really do appreciate it!

Jill/Twipply Skwood said...

Oh my gosh!!! I'm sorry for the rotten day but SO FUNNY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Finished crapbooking...dear, dear, dear!

jerseytjej said...

Nancy...why. A leprechaun? Jesus, keep me near the cross...Goo thing you threw those damn cute pic's of B in there 'else I woulda walked away sad...lol!